|this image was originally made for the popular 10 ways to get revenge post, bad bombchell! but it kinda fits this post :)|
hmm so Bad Bombchell vs Good Bombchell, and by bad I don't mean Naughty... I mean just downright bad.
Today while reading Jess's blog i read the coolest story: It's a popular Native American (Cherokee) story, "Good Wolf vs Bad Wolf."
omg I always considered myself a good person. I remember when I told my friends "I'm a good person, I don't drink & drive!" and they burst out laughing. Really I don't drink and drive, I don't think it's good, so I don't do it. This story made me question myself, and what wolf I am. I'm not saying people who drink & drive do are bad people necessarily because I've let drunk people or worse drive me (aka because i didn't drive lol), but it's reckless. As i see it, I do normal stuff, I'm more nice than I'm mean, I say 75% nice, 25% bitch, not too bad, right? I have my issues, but they can't be that bad because some people have serious issues!!!
Ever heard of that bad wolf, good wolf story? If you haven't, well here you go..
"One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people. He said, "My son, the battle is between 2 wolves.One is Evil. It is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.The other is Good. It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith."The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, "Which wolf wins?"The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed." "
when i first read this I was like, OMG i'm more of a bad wolf, cause the good wolf definitely sounds like a mythical creature in comparison.
let's see how I stand:
- anger: check
- envy: not really, kinda sorta, but not really, okay fine I envy some people's blogs! well just 3, see so... not really, but I get a ping of jealousy when I see a novelist thats under 25 like the "ps: i love you" lady. (however I've never been envious of a photographer, just in awe of the great ones)... ok I'm tired of justifying my envy
- sorrow:greatefully no
- regret: not really
- greed: nope
- arrogance: sure guys I've liked have been slightly arrogant. I might be warped enough to find it slightly sexy. I need help!!! lol
- self-pity: why not
- guilt: I don't know, kinda. isn't that natural, oh well I blame Catholicsm!! catholic guilt & cultural guilt is definitely fun, not! maybe they should add "blame" as a trait of the bad wolf.
- resentment: slightly
- inferiority: nope
- lies: def not, unless maybe you count omission, or being good with words, I call it "HR." *sigh* this makes me sound like I'm lying, but i really truly try to avoid lying, so I hate when people downright ask me a hard question because they know I'll answer truthfully. I'm sure my mum loves this.
- false pride: hmmmm, how do you know it's false?
- superiority: hmmm
- ego: Yup!
- joy: huh
- peace: a dream
- love: sure
- hope: sure,
- serenity: do people really exist who have this???
- humility: i'll work on it
- kindness: yes! finally something
- benevolence: intention
- empathy: sure
- generosity: I don't know, maybe not enough, yea def not enough
- truth: yup (go back to lies)
- compassion: yea
- faith:: hmmm, slowly but surely
It's definitely time for me to feed my good wolf!! you know what, the first time I read this story I thought most of my attributes were with the bad wolf, and barely any were with the good wolf, but now I see i'm a bit of both.
From reading jess's blog, I realized or it reinforced my forgotten belief that we have a dialectic relationship within ourselves. It's a tug of war, of so many choices, and we are the end result. Watching the Arrangement Bureau on the plane made me remember we all have free will, we just don't choose to exercise it but many of us act as if we have no choices. Sure some choices are less favorable than others, or require more patience, but it's still a choice. And i can say I am who I am today because of the people i've been around; friends, family, professors, school, the things i have chosen to eat, experiences that have occurred, and decisons I have made. (huh?? did someone ask for my major in college? it was Sociology. did you just say now it all makes sense? lol)
You know what? this wolf isn't too bad :) but I could definitely do better, and so can you. A little at a time, a little a day, and who know we might become that mythical good wolf or better.
-signed Bombchell Oprah ---- Mark & LaaLaa yall asked her so you better read lol.
I always joke that admiting you have a problem is the first step, but after admitting it I never do anything about it. I'm lazy (i still haven't decided if I want to do anything about that, I don't think I want to *hides face*), I procrastinate (dear heaven this needs to change, i keep getting into horrible situations), and anger (remember this post).
Well last week I decided to take a step (I know 6 months - years later but it's a step!!!)
I bought a book on anger & procrastination!! * insert bbm happy dance*
step 3 will be to read it
step 4 is to practice what I learn.
lets just enjoy step 2 for now. So.... what wolf are you feeding? and remember from Today you can consciously decide what wolf to food or how much food to give either.